Kissinger went to pick up the 1973 Nobel Peace Prize whilst the US was bombing the hell out of North Vietnam; Suu Kyi went to pick up her 1991 Nobel & a dozen other honorifics in 2012 whilst Burma was engaged in a genocidal onslaught against the Rohingya, causing tens of thousands to flee for their lives. Even sarcasm fails to express the contempt this all deserves. Now our man PM Modi–who more than once publicly repudiated climate change & whose policies have removed all impediments to environmental plunder, including revoking the rights of tribals to forest land & approving coal mining in forests–was just given the UN Champions of the Earth award by UN chief Antonio Guterres for his contributions to environmental protection, the sole contribution being a promise to eliminate plastic bags by 2022. If Kissinger & Suu Kyi can get the Nobel for world peace despite war & genocide, why not Modi for getting into the Downward Facing Dog yoga position, chanting Om, & publicly committing India to increasing carbon emissions?

Not to be outdone by the sarcasms of the Nobel committee, South Korea just selected Modi for the 2018 Seoul Peace Prize for his contributions to world peace, for furthering democracy in India, & for his Modinomics policies which eliminate economic inequality between rich & poor in India. The 78 million homeless Indians, the 90 million living on less than US$1 a day, the 7 million slum dwellers, & the millions in the oppressed castes might have something to say about that eliminating poverty & inequality thing.

What contributions to world peace is the Seoul committee talking about? Modi’s growing military relationship with Israel? India’s growing involvement in the US war in Afghanistan? Its brutal & violent military occupation of Kashmir, including nightly hunt to kill operations & massacres of civilians? Its pogroms against Muslims orchestrated by Modi’s party the BJP? Its campaign portraying Rohingya refugees as terrorists & the deportation of seven Rohingya refugees back to the killing fields of Burma? Its growing political repression of Dalit activists in India? This award also goes way beyond sarcasm into the realms of stark raving mad & renders these peace awards more worthless than toilet paper.

Who’s next for the Nobel & Seoul Peace Prizes? Duterte? Assad? Trump? Netanyahu? General Sisi? Marx once said history repeats itself–first as tragedy & then as farce. In the barbaric phase of capitalism, it isn’t possible to tell the difference. No need to demand Modi be stripped of his awards since these award committees won’t hear of it. You have to talk to his ass when he’s leading Indian nationalists in the Downward Facing Dog position where they’re getting in contact with their inner selves. It’s the best position for burying your head in the sand.

(Photo of Modi doing the Kissing Ass asana with Trump)