Pachyderm meets Betty & Phil: in a case of anthropomorphism gone wild, zoo officials at Whipsnade Zoo outside London report Donna the elephant was “thrilled” & “excited” to meet Betty & Phil Windsor yesterday. That would be the first time that anyone was thrilled to meet the flatulent Phil in his entire 95 years. Even Betty calls him her “anus horribilis.”

Trying to avoid charges of groveling or projecting their own sniveling servility on to elephants who are renowned for emotional depth, the zoo authorities claim they tracked communications in the barn & could see they were excited. It could have been Joe Schmo from Kokomo & Donna would have loved that banana. One is reminded of the famous line from Mae West, “Is that a banana in your hand…?”

(Photo by Hannah McKay/Reuters)